Donald Trump won the presidency in an Electoral College landslide — even though he’s the classic Rich Selfish Loudmouth stereotype we’ve seen in countless movies. Now, scores of other stock-movie-villain types are lining up to run for political office – and they’re being eagerly courted by both political parties.
“Voters have always been most comfortable with easily recognized types,” explained campaign strategist Hallie Boylkin. “In the past, we tried to run candidates who were squeaky-clean, square-jawed hero types. But today the ideal candidate looks less like Robert Redford and more like Boris Karloff.
OUT: Square-jawed, earnest Robert Redford seemed a dream candidate in the 1970s — but not anymore.
“The public wants leaders who are strong and decisive, and who aren’t squeamish about cutting moral corners if it’s in the national interest. Today no political candidate can expect serious consideration from the two major parties unless he or she falls into one or more of the best known villain types.”
The Rich Selfish Loudmouth is a familiar figure in movies, particularly to fans of horror flicks. When a crisis arises, he usually belittles the hero’s plan and temporarily gains control of the group.
“He’s the guy who tries to close the gate when there’s still a mother and her kid running from the zombies, or steals that last vial of an antidote for himself,” said Boylkin. “When he’s finally torn apart by walkers or eaten by a giant monster, it’s usually a stand-up-and-cheer moment for the audience.”
Variations of the “rich jerk” character appear in non-horror flicks like Titanic, in which Billy Zane plays a wealthy snob who thinks only of saving his own neck as the ship goes down.
RICH SELFISH JERK Cal played by Billy Zane in Titanic isn’t above smacking his fiancee or turning yellow as the doomed ship sinks.
“Candidate Trump fit this mold to a T,” observed the strategist. “He bragged about everything from his billions to his I.Q., claimed he knew more about ISIS than the generals and mocked POWs like John McCain for being captured – instead of ducking service in Vietnam as he did. That ‘rich, cowardly braggart’ image helped to propel Mr. Trump into the White House. Voters reasoned that a guy who could keep himself that safe and rich could help all Americans be secure and wealthy too.”
Here are 14 other standard movie bad guy types and why they’re expected to win big in coming elections:
THE SUAVE AND SARDONIC ENGLISHMAN: Epitomized by James Mason in North by Northwest, this villain is unfailingly polite. In an era of name-calling and coarse political discourse in Washington, voters yearn for such civility.
THE BRUTAL BUT CHARISMATIC BULLY: In uncertain times, voters gravitate toward Alpha males like Negan (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) of The Walking Dead fame, a take-charge guy with a knack for motivating others.
THE COLD SCIENTIFIC GENIUS, exemplified by Dr. No, the first movie nemesis of James Bond. Americans recognize the need for leaders with brainpower to spare, who operate on the basis of facts — not emotion.
THE HOODLUM WHO LIVES BY A CODE, like Sanchez (Robert Davi), Bond’s drug-dealing foe in Licence to Kill. Now more than ever, voters long for leaders who cherish “old-fashioned” values such as love of family, word of honor and personal loyalty.
THE UNPREDICTABLE NUTJOB: Jovial one minute, shooting up the joint the next, this mercurial type was best personified by Joe Peschi as Tommy DeVito in Goodfellas. Leaders like these are able to keep America’s enemies off balance.
THE OVER-SEXED FEMME FATALE, portrayed memorably by Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. A lady leader who’s not afraid to use her feminine wiles could have a macho strongman like Putin eating out of her hand.
RELIGIOUS FANATIC: Ever since teacher-led prayer was taken out of the schools, many Americans have pined for leaders who wear their religious views on their sleeve — or better yet their hands, like Robert Mitchum in Night of the Hunter.
GREEDY BUSINESSMAN: With the national debt soaring out of control, many voters feel we need leaders who focus on the bottom line and nothing else, just like miserly Mr. Burns on The Simpsons.
THE MEAN GIRL: Cheerleader types who use their superior social skills — not H-bombs — as weapons, like Regina (Rachel McAdams) in Mean Girls are the kind of leaders the world desperately needs right now.
MUMBLING WEIRDO: Christopher Walken has mastered the art of playing a creepy villain in films such as Things to do in Denver When You’re Dead. A leader who rambles incoherently can keep our nation’s adversaries guessing about what we’ll do next.
HEARTLESS YUPPIE: Like sleazy company stooge Carter Burke (Paul Reiser) in Aliens, this type of leader understands that sometimes peons have to suffer so that the more deserving can enjoy the benefits of success. A certain Ayn Rand-loving Speaker of the House is clearly modeled on this type.
THE HUMORLESS FEMALE DRONE: Best exemplified by Rosa Klebb in From Russia With Love. A no-nonsense woman who rejects all emotional attachments can be as competent a leader as a man, many American voters feel.
THE OBSESSED STALKER: This type’s most famous incarnation is Kathy Bates as Annie Wilkes in Misery. Commitment like that isn’t easy to come by, voters know. When stalkers are able to redirect their energy into productive enterprises, the benefits to society can be amazing, as is evident in the works of singer Adelle.
THE MISGUIDED WARMONGER: Whether it’s Samuel L. Jackson sending his men to die fighting a 500-foot gorilla, or that general using tanks to chase down a misunderstood space alien, this character is always wrong in movies. But in real life, as American voters know, you sometimes “absolutely, positively” have to kill every mother-@#$% in a country.
If you enjoyed this article, check out C. Michael Forsyth’s collection of news satire, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats
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