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Think Your Way Out of Poverty — Using Ben Carson Mind Tricks!   Leave a comment

BEn Carson

MIND OVER MATTER: Dr. Ben Carson, our new Secretary of Housing and Urban Development, has advice for poor Americans.

 

By C. Michael Forsyth

WASHINGTON — You can live like a king, even if you don’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of —  by tricking your brain into thinking you’re rich!

“Poverty is just a state of mind, as Dr. Ben Carson recently said,” according to Revis Washington, author of the upcoming book, Think Yourself Rich. “A medieval peasant who had all the things a ‘poor’ American has today, like indoor plumbing, would feel that he was on top of the world. And imagine how a Neanderthal man would react to a simple potato chip sandwich or a cozy cardboard shelter. It’s all relative. The government doesn’t need anti-poverty programs. The mind is a far more powerful tool.”

A few easily learned mental tricks that Washington calls “mind jujitsu” are all you need to be wealthy inside your head.

“You’re essentially brainwashing yourself out of poverty,” the author explained.

Here, from the expert, are five great Jedi-like mind moves you can use to achieve instant mental wealth:

REINVENT YOUR DINING EXPERIENCE – When you are eating cold scrambled eggs and government cheese, close your eyes and visualize fine beluga caviar and gourmet brie.

REDEFINE YOUR SURROUNDINGS — A rat is only a “rat” if you choose to see it as one. In your mind, transform your scampering house guests into playful squirrels.

RECONCEPTUALIZE TRANSPORTATION — Don’t think “We’re living in our car.” Tell your brain that you and your five children are on a fun road trip through the south of France.

RETHINK FASHION — Pretend those ripped and threadbare clothes are the latest chic look in Europe. Picture a skeletal model sporting your duds on a runway in Milan.

REJECT MODERN MEDICINE — Instead of fretting about not being able to afford antibiotics for your family, imagine that you are trying to beef up your immune systems the natural way.

Poor folks 2

CHEER UP! Poor folks like this family snapped by photographer Mary Ellen Mark, can easily fix their plight with upbeat thoughts and a little imagination.

Copyright C. Michael Forsyth

If you enjoyed this article by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of news satire, available on Kindle and in other eBook formatsBizarre News Cover 5.

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