Archive for August 2017

Confederate Statues Coming to Life — and Taking Vengeance.   Leave a comment

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STATUE of Civil War legend and KKK leader Gen. Nathan Bedford Forrest escaped from warehouse where it was stored.

By. C. Michael Forsyth

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The statues of 13 Confederate war heroes have come alive to seek revenge on the living, according to horrified paranormal investigators.

At least eight deaths and 36 sword and cannon injuries have been attributed to the golem-like figures, since their removal from public parks and town squares. The victims have primarily been liberal activists who had pushed for the removal of the controversial monuments, but the take-no-prisoners statues mow down anyone who stands in their way. Even an ice cream vendor was trampled to death when he inadvertently blocked the path of the mounted statue of General Robert E. Lee as the frightening figure galloped down the sidewalk.

“These entities are very, very angry,” said psychic researcher Ted Luebeck. ” We’re asking for the public’s help in tracking the statues down before they do more harm.”

Community organizer Margaret Fisling fell victim to a 102-year-old statue of General Stonewall Jackson as she was erecting an “Impeach Donald Trump” lawn sign outside her Charlotte home. Her husband Keith watched in helpless horror as the marble menace bore down on the 45-year-old woman, sword waving.

“First, we heard the eerie sound of ‘Dixie’ whistling over the wind,” said Fisling. “When we looked up we saw the statue, which we recognized from protest marches, charging straight us. I dove behind our garden gnome, but Maggie couldn’t get out of the way in time. Gen. Jackson’s horse knocked her down, then after about 50 feet, he turned around. He pointed his saber, galloped forward at full speed and sliced off her head off. It was like something out of a horror movie.”

Authorities were initially skeptical of the far-fetched story, until police discovered horse tracks on the scene and residue consistent with pigeon droppings.

Since May, scores of monuments honoring Confederate generals, as well as Jefferson Davis and the judge who ruled in favor of slavery in the Dredd Scott decision, have been removed from cities in North Carolina, Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee and other states. While some have found new homes in museums, or as lawn ornaments for Civil War buffs, most have been shipped for temporary housing at warehouses. The 13 that sprang to life were all kept at the Old Times Warehouse and Antique Shop on the outskirts of Charlotte, according to investigator Luebeck.

Robert E. Lee

REMOVAL of statues of Confederate greats like the beloved General Robert E. Lee has sparked a nationwide debate.

A statue of General Nathan Bedford Forrest, who became an organizer of the Klu Klux Klan after the war, was the first to go missing from the storage facility, on August 16.

“That morning, I was wheeling in the latest addition, some colonel who fought in the Battle of Bull Run, when I found the spot where the Forrest statue had been gathering dust for months was empty,” said warehouse employee Stan Beasby. “At first, we figured it had been stolen, but it was funny because that statue weighs over 3,500 pounds. Who would have thought these guys have been marching and riding straight out of here?”

Over the following several nights, the statues of other legendary soldiers went on the lam, as well as a bust of General P.G.T. Beauregard that’s believed to have hopped to freedom. Paranormal experts can’t explain how the statues, most chiseled out of solid stone or made of bronze, and have no joints, are moving about. However, they do have a theory about the supernatural mechanism that has animated them.

“The warehouse also holds old store mannequins, junk from amusement park haunted houses, and figures from a wax museum in New Orleans that shut down last year,” Luebeck revealed.

“Back in 1988, a group of college students carried out a ‘voodoo’ ceremony that briefly brought some of the wax figures alive for two days, including one of Lizzie Borden. There were several serious injuries before they were put down with a blowtorch. We believe it’s conceivable that the surviving wax figures somehow ‘infected’ the Confederate statues.”

Talos

STATUES rarely come to life outside of movies like the 1963 Ray Harryhausen classic “Jason and the Argonauts.”

While baffled police race to track down the missing monuments, dozens of self-proclaimed “monster hunters” have converged on the area to put a stop to the killing spree. But some proud southerners profess sympathy for the hard-charging symbols of the South. And they reject any connection between their idols and slavery or racism.

“It’s not a racial thing,” insisted Beau Castland of the organization Keep Your Yankee Hands Off Our Heritage. “The media doesn’t point this out, but only one of the victims was black. Four were white, two were Asian Americans and one was a visitor from Samoa.”

Copyright C. Michael Forsyth

If you enjoyed this mind-bending yarn by fiction writer C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.

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1 in 20 Chance Eclipse will Never End, Expert Warns   1 comment

Solar_eclipse_1999_4_NRBy C. Michael Forsyth

GREENVILLE, S.C. — Millions of enthusiastic American children will run outside today to view the solar eclipse, but their joy may be short-lived — because the eclipse will never end, if members of a diabolical secret society have their way.

The mysterious cabal of 13 self-proclaimed sorcerers, telepaths and necromancers reportedly plans to perform a terrifying ancient ritual which, if successful, will freeze the moon in position blocking the sun – plunging the Earth into darkness permanently.

“It sounds crazy – so crazy it just might work,” says Dr. Henry Jorgenbach, a professor of astrological physics who learned of the scheme at a recent New Age gathering. “My colleagues and I calculate that there’s a 5 % chance that they’ll pull it off and the eclipse will continue indefinitely. The cult hopes to usher in a new Dark Age, in which science and reason are abandoned and mankind is ruled by superstition and fear.”

The sinister secret society, known as the Circle of Dark, has existed for thousands of years and has tried many times before to interfere with the rare celestial events, according to the expert.

tablet“A Syrian clay tablet, in the ancient Ugaritic language, records a solar eclipse that occurred on March 5, 1223 B.C.,” Dr. Jorgenbach reveals. “The tablet describes how a group of renegade priests tried to perform a forbidden ceremony to make the eclipse last forever. Fortunately, they were stopped in the nick of time. Evidence suggests that this was the origin of the Circle of Dark.”

The Circle has attempted the ritual countless times since then, but has never been able to extend an eclipse longer than six days. The most recent bid, in 1979, failed when a shipment of goat’s blood needed for the ceremony got lost in the mail. But this time, the secret society has all its ducks in a row.

“They’ve assembled some of the most powerful telepaths and sorcerers in the world here in Greenville, S.C., one of the best viewing spots for the eclipse,” says Dr. Jorgenbach. “They’ve never been better positioned to succeed.”

In many cultures worldwide, myths warn of a civilization-ending eclipse. The Ch’orti’, indigenous Mayas, believed “an eclipse of the sun that lasts more than a day will bring the end of the world, and the spirits of the dead will come to life and eat those on earth,” an anthropologist was quoted as saying in the prestigious New York Times.

If the ceremony succeeds, the earth will also cease to rotate, leaving America perpetually under the eclipse, and subject to sinister supernatural forces. But it will be no bed of roses on the other side of the world, which, without the sun, will simply be in eternal darkness.

“If something like this were to happen, which sounds unlikely, the effects on agriculture would be devastating and almost immediate,” explains a U.S. Department of Agriculture source. “Plant life depends on photosynthesis and with that interrupted, we’d be looking at worldwide famine.”

The fanatics are scheduled to converge on Greenville’s famous Falls Park, a site popular for picnicking and outdoor performances of Shakespeare, several hours before the eclipse begins.

Panic and chaos would likely sweep the U.S. if the eclipse fails to end as expected. But hopefully, that will never happen. Dr. Jorgenbach and his colleagues have organized a team of local psychics, ministers and rabbis to perform a counter-ceremony during the eclipse, designed to derail the Circle’s scheme.

He says, “All that ordinary citizens can do now is wait, pray and watch the skies.”

Copyright C. Michael Forsyth

If you enjoyed this mind-bending “what if” story by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.

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