Archive for the ‘Paranormal’ Category

Confederate Statues Coming to Life — and Taking Vengeance.   Leave a comment

Nathan 3

STATUE of Civil War legend and KKK leader Gen. Nathan Bedford Forrest escaped from warehouse where it was stored.

By. C. Michael Forsyth

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The statues of 13 Confederate war heroes have come alive to seek revenge on the living, according to horrified paranormal investigators.

At least eight deaths and 36 sword and cannon injuries have been attributed to the golem-like figures, since their removal from public parks and town squares. The victims have primarily been liberal activists who had pushed for the removal of the controversial monuments, but the take-no-prisoners statues mow down anyone who stands in their way. Even an ice cream vendor was trampled to death when he inadvertently blocked the path of the mounted statue of General Robert E. Lee as the frightening figure galloped down the sidewalk.

“These entities are very, very angry,” said psychic researcher Ted Luebeck. ” We’re asking for the public’s help in tracking the statues down before they do more harm.”

Community organizer Margaret Fisling fell victim to a 102-year-old statue of General Stonewall Jackson as she was erecting an “Impeach Donald Trump” lawn sign outside her Charlotte home. Her husband Keith watched in helpless horror as the marble menace bore down on the 45-year-old woman, sword waving.

“First, we heard the eerie sound of ‘Dixie’ whistling over the wind,” said Fisling. “When we looked up we saw the statue, which we recognized from protest marches, charging straight us. I dove behind our garden gnome, but Maggie couldn’t get out of the way in time. Gen. Jackson’s horse knocked her down, then after about 50 feet, he turned around. He pointed his saber, galloped forward at full speed and sliced off her head off. It was like something out of a horror movie.”

Authorities were initially skeptical of the far-fetched story, until police discovered horse tracks on the scene and residue consistent with pigeon droppings.

Since May, scores of monuments honoring Confederate generals, as well as Jefferson Davis and the judge who ruled in favor of slavery in the Dredd Scott decision, have been removed from cities in North Carolina, Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee and other states. While some have found new homes in museums, or as lawn ornaments for Civil War buffs, most have been shipped for temporary housing at warehouses. The 13 that sprang to life were all kept at the Old Times Warehouse and Antique Shop on the outskirts of Charlotte, according to investigator Luebeck.

Robert E. Lee

REMOVAL of statues of Confederate greats like the beloved General Robert E. Lee has sparked a nationwide debate.

A statue of General Nathan Bedford Forrest, who became an organizer of the Klu Klux Klan after the war, was the first to go missing from the storage facility, on August 16.

“That morning, I was wheeling in the latest addition, some colonel who fought in the Battle of Bull Run, when I found the spot where the Forrest statue had been gathering dust for months was empty,” said warehouse employee Stan Beasby. “At first, we figured it had been stolen, but it was funny because that statue weighs over 3,500 pounds. Who would have thought these guys have been marching and riding straight out of here?”

Over the following several nights, the statues of other legendary soldiers went on the lam, as well as a bust of General P.G.T. Beauregard that’s believed to have hopped to freedom. Paranormal experts can’t explain how the statues, most chiseled out of solid stone or made of bronze, and have no joints, are moving about. However, they do have a theory about the supernatural mechanism that has animated them.

“The warehouse also holds old store mannequins, junk from amusement park haunted houses, and figures from a wax museum in New Orleans that shut down last year,” Luebeck revealed.

“Back in 1988, a group of college students carried out a ‘voodoo’ ceremony that briefly brought some of the wax figures alive for two days, including one of Lizzie Borden. There were several serious injuries before they were put down with a blowtorch. We believe it’s conceivable that the surviving wax figures somehow ‘infected’ the Confederate statues.”

Talos

STATUES rarely come to life outside of movies like the 1963 Ray Harryhausen classic “Jason and the Argonauts.”

While baffled police race to track down the missing monuments, dozens of self-proclaimed “monster hunters” have converged on the area to put a stop to the killing spree. But some proud southerners profess sympathy for the hard-charging symbols of the South. And they reject any connection between their idols and slavery or racism.

“It’s not a racial thing,” insisted Beau Castland of the organization Keep Your Yankee Hands Off Our Heritage. “The media doesn’t point this out, but only one of the victims was black. Four were white, two were Asian Americans and one was a visitor from Samoa.”

Copyright C. Michael Forsyth

If you enjoyed this mind-bending yarn by fiction writer C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.

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Panties of Peril Stolen — And Police Warn Thief Could Die From “Curse.”   3 comments

Can an ordinary pair of panties like these kill?

NEVER put on these panties — no matter what, authorities warn.

By C. Michael Forsyth

EDISON, N.J. — The notorious Panties of Peril, widely considered the world’s most dangerous paranormal object, have been stolen from a heavily guarded titanium vault – and authorities fear that whoever ripped off the undies is in mortal peril!

“Four women who wore this undergarment suffered cruel and bizarre deaths,” warned Dr. Dan Greavesby of the prestigious New Jersey Institute for Paranormal Research. “Second only to plutonium, we consider the Panties of Peril to be, pound for pound, the most harmful material on Earth to human life. We’re pleading with whoever took them to return them at once – before he or she suffers a similar fate.”

Investigators say the panties were stored in a 16” by 18” safe within a second 3’ by 5′ safe, 140 feet below the surface in the sub-sub basement of the famous institute. The culprits dug a tunnel beneath the safe and drilled into it from below. Police are unsure of the motives of the thief or thieves.

“It could be a collector of rare occult objects,” said Det. John Relters of the State Special Investigations Bureau. “It might be a deviant with an underwear fetish or even simply college pranksters bent on pulling off ‘the ultimate panty raid.’ But whoever is in possession of those panties is playing with fire. From what we’ve been told, even someone who horses around with the underwear on his head could die within minutes.”

The strange tale of the dreaded drawers first came to light in April, 2010 as reported here later that year. College coed Amber Walyde, 19, was electrocuted by her blow dryer soon after purchasing the innocuous-looking, pink cotton panties. Her death was quickly followed by that of her roommate, killed in a freak Segway accident, and then her kid sister Raven, who suffered an allergic reaction to a bee sting while dancing around in the panties she’d inherited. After the first victim’s Aunt Sandy was decapitated by a falling ceiling fan, the panties were turned over to the institute for safe keeping.

“The supernatural mechanism at work remains unclear,” revealed Dr. Greavesby. “We have traced the garment back to a factory in Manila, which is ground zero for a little-understood form of witchcraft known as kulam. One theory is that a disgruntled factory worker placed a curse upon the panties. Or it’s possible they are possessed by the vengeful spirit of an employee who died in a building collapse that year.”

Any contact with human skin is dangerous, experts say. The panties can be handled safely only with lead-lined gloves. A research assistant donned the underwear for two minutes in what Dr. Greavesby now acknowledges was a very risky experiment. The heart monitor used to make sure she was all right short-circuited, delivering an electrical shock that put her into cardiac arrest.

“Miraculously we were able to enter the hermitically sealed chamber and remove the panties in time to resuscitate her,” the expert divulged.

Now cops are hoping against hope that the thief they’ve dubbed the Panties of Peril Pervert will recognize how foolhardy his actions were and turn in the lethal lingerie. The Institute has offered a $100,000 reward for the safe return of the Panties of Peril.

“All we want is the underwear back – no questions asked,” the researcher said.

Copyright C. Michael Forsyth

If you enjoyed this mind-bending story by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.

Bizarre News Cover 5.

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