SKIMPY Speedos are the preferred beach attire of Frenchmen, who usually wear them with no ill effects.
By C. Michael Forsyth
MIAMI — As 51-year-old French tourist Jean-Claude Rumiere strutted down Miami Beach in a Speedo, he hoped to dazzle lady beachgoers with the sight of his pudgy bod in all its glory. But that plan went up in smoke when his skimpy swimwear mysteriously burst into flame!
More than 20 eyewitnesses watched aghast as the businessman’s teensy bikini-style trunks became enveloped in what they describe as a “bright bluish blaze” and were reduced to ashes within seconds.
“The guy was waddling down the beach with his gut hanging out over his tight bathing suit and his ‘package’ on full display,” said eyewitness Bill Yerling, 38. “He obviously thought he looked great, but it was pretty gross. I covered my daughter’s eyes and a lot of people were glaring at him.
“Suddenly smoke started to come from his Speedo and it caught fire. The guy screamed his head off and ran into the water to put it out.”
Rumiere suffered second-degree burns on his buttocks and genitals, say police, who are investigating the bizarre August 12 incident.
Psychic researcher Lee-Anne Pryce calls it an apparent case of spontaneous human combustion or SHC. She believes that the hostile stares of dozens of beachgoers combined into highly focused psychic energy.
“It’s called the social pyrokinetic effect, and it’s believed to be responsible for about 1 in 5 cases of SHC,” explained Atlanta-based Pryce.
“We all have heard of the experiment in which hundreds of college students were instructed to concentrate on a candle in the middle of a stadium and ‘will’ it to light. Famously, they succeeded. In the Miami case, something very similar occurred. The only difference was that the energy was directed unconsciously.”
Pryce recounted a 1972 case in which a British bride burst into flame at the altar as several of the groom’s former girlfriends stared angrily at her.
“In that instance, the long, flowing gown went up like a Roman candle and the victim was quickly incinerated,” the expert noted. “Most cases of SHC are fatal. What probably saved Mr. Rumiere is that the article of clothing that caught fire was so small.”
Copyright C. Michael Forsyth
If you enjoyed this mind-bending story by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.
.
The author of this article also wrote the acclaimed horror novel Hour of the Beast. In the opening chapter, the unthinkable happens. Then things get out of hand.
Hour of the Beast is available in hardcover and softcover at Amazon.com. But you can save $4 by clicking HERE! The Kindle version is just $7 and the Ebook is a measly $5. Be the first on your block to read this bone-chilling tale — before the motion picture hits the big screen.
TISSUE samples were taken from baby elephant found frozen on the ship.
By C. Michael Forsyth
GOTEBORG, Sweden — An extensive study of the mitochondrial DNA from 17 mammals discovered dead aboard a mysterious Noah’s Ark-like vessel last year has yielded proof that it originated in a parallel universe, scientists say.
“Each of the mammals is genetically similar to its counterpart on Earth, except for a single mutation found in their mitochondrial DNA. This mutation occurred in their common ancestor approximately 80 million years ago,” revealed Dr. Alberik Hakansson, a leading expert in molecular phylogenetics and a co-author of the study.
“This is consistent with the theory that around that time the two universes diverged and developed two markedly different histories.”
Reports of the discovery of the ship frozen in Antarctic ice by Swedish researchers in February 2011 sparked an uproar in the scientific community. The vessel matched biblical descriptions of the Ark in its physical dimensions and contained representatives of scores of species. However, all the animals as well as the entire crew were frozen stiff, as reported on this site last year.
Scientists, Bible scholars and armchair archaeologists proposed a variety of theories to explain the bizarre find. Some Christian leaders asserted that the ship had been planted in the ice as an elaborate hoax cooked up by atheists. Others suggested that a copycat of Noah built his own ark and ventured out during the Flood with disastrous results.
THE MULTIVERSE theory holds that our universe is but one of a vast number.
The theory that the ship, dubbed Noah’s Ark 2 by researchers, hailed from an alternate universe was first proposed by quantum physicist Dr. Jeremy Blinkley, often described as the world’s smartest man. The concept that our universe is just one of many in a “multiverse” is accepted by many theoretical physicists. The expert says he’s “tickled pink” by the results of the year-long DNA study.
“This makes the search for the so-called God particle look like a 2nd grade science project,” Dr. Blinkley declared. “It simultaneously provides powerful proof of the multiverse theory, supports basic tenets of evolution and confirms the literal truth of the Bible.”
MITOCHONDRIAL DNA, found in every cell of a human or animal body, is a useful tool in tracing the ancestry of a species.
Mitochondrial DNA, discovered in the 1960s by Margit and Sylvan Nass with an electron microscope, is a form of DNA located in structures known as mitochondria found in every cell of the body.
“Mitochondrial DNA is inherited only from the mother,” explained Dr. Hakansson.“With ‘ordinary’ DNA the offspring gets a mix of genes from both parents creating a garbled genetic history.
“Since mitochondrial DNA allows you to trace a direct genetic line through the mother, that makes it ideal for mapping out evolutionary trees.”
ANIMALS found frozen aboard Noah’s Ark 2 were in a remarkable state of preservation.
The analysis revealed that the animals from Noah’s Ark 2 all share a mutation in their mitochondrial DNA.
“This mutation must have occurred in the common ancestor of all placental mammals,” revealed Dr. Hakansson. “This was the Eomaia scansoria, a shrew-like creature that weighed no more than 9 ounces.”
Eomaia scansoria (Latin for “tree-climbing dawn mother”) was the ancestor of virtually all mammals, experts say.
“The mutation was a subtle shift in a single nucleotide,” the researcher continued. “The elephant, giraffe and donkey, and other species we took tissue samples from all share the trait. Corresponding animals on our Earth, although they look similar, don’t have it.”
Computers played a vital role in the study, filling in blanks with an assortment of complex algorithms.
“The programs helped us reconstruct several genome sequences,” explained Catherine Gorweyde of the U.K., who led the project’s computer paleogenomics team. The study did not include egg-laying mammals such as the platypus, only animals that bear their young live, known as placental mammals, she added.
For millions of years, the history of the alternate universe was probably quite similar to our own, experts believe.
“It had primitive cavemen like our own Adam and Eve and, presumably, all the significant events in Genesis leading up to the Flood occurred,” said Dr. Hakansson. “But obviously after the Flood the history of the other universe would have been dramatically different, since Noah’s Ark 2 foundered off the coast of Antarctica and all aboard perished.
“We are almost certainly talking about a world devoid of both human life and land animals.”
Biblical scholar Reverend Bob Sudlen, who calls the lab results “stunning,” says we may never how Noah’s Ark 2 got here from the other universe or why it sank.
“Perhaps it was a freak storm or maybe someone on board cracked a joke that angered God,” he observed. “We can only be sure that it was part of the divine plan.”
ALL ABOARD! Noah’s Ark saved a handful of humans and two of every animal — at least in OUR universe.
If you enjoy reading fact and fiction woven skillfully together, you might enjoy the thriller Houdini vs. Rasputin, written by the author of this article.
If you enjoyed this mind-bending story by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.
.
If you found this story by fiction writer C. Michael Forsyth entertaining, you might enjoy his novels…
The creator of Sherlock Holmes and the world’s greatest magician probe a paranormal mystery in new thriller.
The tables turn on an identity thief in the latest thriller by C. Michael Forsyth. To check it out, click HERE.
In Hour of the Beast, a young bride is raped by a werewolf on her wedding night. When her sons grow up and head to college, things REALLY get out of hand.
There are great horror movies that even aficionados of the genre have missed and are often overlooked on top 100 lists. Here are a dozen rarely viewed films that gave me the willies:
A remote forest is home turf for a demon in “Equinox.”
EQUINOX, 1970
Four young people searching a remote forest for a missing scientist get more than they bargained for when they encounter the demon Asmodeus. Taking refuge in a cave, they come across an ancient book the evil being needs to spread destruction beyond his wooded domain. Heroically, the humans fight to keep The Book out of the demon’s claws, while trapped within his forest by a mysterious force field. Asmodeus sends a series of monstrous minions, including a giant ape-like creature with cloven hooves, to retrieve The Book.
Though shot on a shoestring budget, the movie makes create use of Ray Harryhausen-type stop motion animation. Plot-wise, it is a forerunner to “The Evil Dead,” and the filmmakers could show the producers of “The Blair Witch Project” a thing or two about telling an entertaining story with no dough.
A rustic European town harbors a terrible secret in “Vampyr.”
VAMPYR, 1932
Most horror buffs have seen the silent-era vampire film “Nosferatu,” an unauthorized adaptation of Dracula, but only hardcore enthusiasts have seen this 1932 picture from Danish director Carl Theodor Dreyer. Though less well known, it’s every bit as creepy as “Nosferatu.” Inspired by a tale by Carmilla author J. Sheridan Le Fanu, it’s about a student of the occult who stumbles across a village under the curse of a vampire hag.
Although made in the sound era, it too is silent. It benefits from a haunting atmosphere and imaginative effects. Among the most striking, the vampires slinking around the deserted town are seen only as shadows.
A young woman rubs shoulders with history’s most infamous sadist in “Waxwork.”
WAXWORK, 1988
A group of students visit a wax museum featuring 18 villains from horror lore and history. Two are sucked into the waxwork displays, where they run into a werewolf and Dracula. Another two find themselves pitted against zombies and the infamous Marquis de Sade. The concept of universes within the displays struck me as quite original, and I loved how each one is depicted as real as our own. A kinky highlight of the film arises when the teenage girl drawn into de Sade’s world is whipped by the infamous sadist…and kind of likes it! Zach Galligan, who had vanished from the screen after “Gremlins,” does a smashing job as the young hero struggling to rescue her.
Homeowner Jesse (Ayre Gross, left) learns there’s more problems with his new digs than mice in the attic in “House 2.”
HOUSE 2
This horror comedy is a rare case of the sequel surpassing the original. Charlie and Jesse, a pair of yuppie pals, move into an old mansion Jesse has inherited. Rummaging through the basement, Jesse finds a picture of his great-great grandfather in front of a Mayan temple holding a crystal skull. The buddies soon learn that the house has been transformed by the skull his ancestor swiped and that each room is a doorway across space and time. The guys must keep the skull out of the hands of evildoers, while their mettle is tested in a series of harrowing adventures on the other side of these portals. Jonathan Stark, best known as the vampire’s henchman in the original “Fright Night,” is great as the goofier member of the duo. And look for an appearance from a smartalecky young Bill Maher.
A visit to the family crypt reveals clues to an awful curse in “The Undying Monster.”
THE UNDYING MONSTER, 1942
Mystery and horror combine in the curious case of the Hammond family which has been cursed since the Crusades and whose members frequently die under strange circumstances. When the latest Hammond heir is slain by an unidentified creature, intrepid private detective Robert Curtis and his plucky sidekick Christy are summoned to investigate. An early clue is a very peculiar statue in the Hammond family crypt.
What delights me about the film is the successful blend of genres. Curtis brings the logic of a Sherlock Holmes to the case and his relationship with Christy is reminiscent of Nick and Nora of “The Thin Man” fame. The detective takes a scientific approach, which makes the increasingly uncanny events all the more alarming. In one memorable sequence, he uses a microscope to examine a strange hair and it vanishes before his eyes!
Boris Karloff is a father who returns home from a vampire hunt and brings terror with him in “Black Sabbath.”
BLACK SABBATH, 1963
This anthology film boasts some truly terrifying segments. My favorite, “The Wurdalak,” is drawn from a common theme of vampire folklore rarely depicted on film: that when the undead return they first prey on their own relatives.
In 19th century Russia, a young nobleman on a long trip stops at a small rural cottage to ask for shelter. He learns that the family patriarch has disappeared for five days while searching for a vampire, or “wurdalak” as the locals call it. At the stroke of midnight, Dad — Boris Karloff at his creepy best — shows up at the cottage. His disheveled appearance and odd behavior lead his sons to suspect he’s joined the ranks of the undead. The situation makes for a rather tense evening.
“I tell you, I’m not crazy. Now get that hand off my mouth.” Michael Redgrave is a ventriloquist with a sinister dummy in “Dead of Night.”
DEAD OF NIGHT, 1945
Another chilling anthology film, it includes the granddaddy of all evil-ventriloquist-dummy stories and a chilling yarn about a haunted antique mirror. The frame story itself (often laughable in such movies) is truly unnerving. In the frame story, a man arrives at a country house party where he reveals to the assembled guests that he has seen them all in a dream. They begin to tell various tales of the supernatural and the uncanny. The frame story climaxes with a haunting twist ending.
“I don’t much like the look of that.” Peter Cushing, right, finds that a fellow scientist has created a deadly new lifeform in “Island of Terror.”
ISLAND OF TERROR, 1966
The great Peter Cushing stars as a scientist investigating the peculiar case of a farmer found dead on a remote British isle without a single bone in his body. He and his companions learn that a researcher working on the island accidentally created a new lifeform from the silicon atom while searching for a cancer cure.
The tentacled creatures, dubbed “silicates,” kill their victims by injecting a bone-dissolving enzyme into their bodies and are virtually indestructible. Trapped on the isolated island, the heroes battle the monsters with guns, Molotov cocktails, dynamite and other weapons to no avail. In one hair-raising scene, Cushing is grabbed by a silicate. With a stiff upper lip, the Englishman sternly instructs a companion to chop off his hand with an ax before its too late.
Wicca is for wimps. These witches are the real deal in “Horror Hotel.”
HORROR HOTEL, 1960
A college coed visits a small Massachusetts town to research the witchcraft trials, unaware that her landlady is the reincarnation of an infamous witch burned at the stake in the 1600s. The accused witch wasn’t innocent – not by a longshot. She and her evil cohorts practice virgin sacrifice in order to remain immortal. Christopher Lee as the missing girl’s professor and her friends must solve the mystery of her disappearance before an unholy ritual on Candlemass Eve. Look for one of the most startling heroic rescue scenes in horror cinema history.
A madman (Patrick O’Neal) doesn’t let a disablity stand in the way of exacting bloody vengeance in “Chamber of Horrors.”
CHAMBER OF HORRORS, 1966
Cesare Danova, the suave actor with the sexy foreign accent that made him a ubiquitous TV guest star, plays the proprietor of a wax museum and amateur sleuth, aided by a dwarf sidekick. When a deranged man named Jason Cravette murders a woman and marries her corpse, Danova helps police bring him to justice.
Unfortunately, the killer escapes from a manacle by amputating his hand and vows vengeance on everyone involved in his capture and trial. In place of his hand, the madman wears an array of deadly weapons. He associates his foes with body parts – for instance, the cop who arrested him is the “arm of the law.” So after each revenge killing he makes off with that body part. The wax museum owner has a special incentive to stop the culprit, because he solved the initial murder and Cravette has indentified him as “the head of the law.” Gulp.
The movie was filmed as a pilot for a series to be called “House of Wax,” but it was deemed too gory for TV. But I would have tuned into such a show every week!
The devil is afoot in Merry Old England in “Blood on Satan’s Claw.”
BLOOD ON SATAN’S CLAW, 1971
This movie is set in village in 17th century England, where a series of bizarre events suggest to superstitious peasants that the devil is afoot. The trouble begins when a farmer plowing a field uncovers a deformed skull with one leering eye. Later, young townsfolk begin to sprout patches of fur and other odd markings on their bodies. It’s up to the local judge, a rational man who is initially skeptical of the supernatural, to stop the epidemic and solve the mystery. High production values and convincing period dialogue elevate the film. It’s like watching a version of “The Crucible” in which Satan really is on the prowl.
Dinner is served! An army officer resorts to cannibalism in “Ravenous.”
RAVENOUS, 1999
The always compelling Guy Pearce ( “L.A. Confidential”) stars in this film, which offers a unique take on cannibalism.
The story takes place during in 1840s California during the Mexican-American War. Pearce plays a U.S. Army captain who comes across the aftermath of a Donner Party-like disaster. The sole survivor, a Colonel Ives, is now hooked on human flesh. According to a Native American legend recounted in the movie, a man who consumes the flesh of his enemies takes their strength but becomes a Wendigo, a demon cursed by a hunger for man meat. Turns out the Indians were right. Col. Ives has cured himself of tuberculosis and turned himself into an invincible superman through cannibalism. Worse still, he gets others addicted and is bent on turning our hero Capt. Boyd into a cannibal too.
I found the notion of cannibal as a sort of vampire thought-provoking and appreciated the film’s dark humor. With great performances from Pearce and Robert Carlyle as the sinister Colonel Ives.
The author of this article also wrote the acclaimed horror novel Hour of the Beast. In the opening chapter, the unthinkable happens. Then things get out of hand.
Hour of the Beast is available in hardcover and softcover at Amazon.com. But you can save $4 by clicking HERE! The Kindle version is just $7 and the Ebook is a measly $5. Be the first on your block to read this bone-chilling tale — before the motion picture hits the big screen.
There are basically two types of zombie movies. The kind that sound pretty good so you go see them and the kind that have such ridiculous titles you HAVE to see them!
Below is a list of the 100 wackiest zombie movie titles of all time:
Wiseguys vs. Zombies
Mark Of The Astro Zombies
Dead and Too Stupid to Know It
Retardead
Juan of the Dead (Cuba)
Holy Virgin Vs. the Evil Dead
Stag Night of the Dead
Jesus H. Zombie
The Legend of Zombie Road
Zombie Commando
Zombie Cheerleader Camp
Brunch of the Living Dead
Zombiegeddon
Die You Zombie Bastards!
Zombies on Broadway
Dorm of the Dead
Swamp Zombies
The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed Up Zombies
The Quick and the Undead
“You’ll sleep with the fishes…again.”
Zombie Dearest
The Worst Horror Movie Ever Made
Vampires Vs. Zombies
Zombie Farm
ZA: Zombies Anonymous
Zombie Brigade
Zombie Honeymoon
Zombie Island Massacre
Zombie Women of Satan
I Was a Zombie for the F.B.I.
Invasion of the Not Quite Dead
Dead and Deader
Zombie Campout
Big Tits Zombie
Ninjas vs. Zombies
Redneck Zombies
Give me a Z…
Zombies Gone Wild
Zombie Strippers
Boy Eats Girl
Zombie Roadkill
Zombies, Zombies, Zombies
A Virgin Among the Living Dead
Dr. Terror’s Gallery of Horrors
Kung Fu Zombie
Enter the Zombies
Mutant Vampire Zombies from the ‘Hood
No exploitation here.
Violent Shit III: Infantry of Doom
Zombie Vegetarians
Zombies Vs. Mardi Gras
Vengeance of the Zombies
Zombie Ninja Gangbangers
Wrath of the Zombies
Silent Night, Zombie Night
Trailer Park of Terror
Ghouls Gone Wild
Giant of Evil Island
Tombs of the Blind Dead
Schoolgirl Apocalypse
Summer Among the Zombies
Space Zombie Bingo
Romeo & Juliet vs. The Living Dead
Punk Rock Zombie Kung Fu Catfight
O.C. Babes and the Slasher of Zombietown
Looks like C. Thomas Howell’s career isn’t coming back from the dead anytime soon.
Oh! My Zombie Mermaid
Rising Up: The Story of the Zombie Rights Movement
Motocross Zombies from Hell
Flesh Eating Mothers
Night of the Living Babes
Nudist Colony of the Dead
Night of the Living Heads
Eat the Parents
Entrails of a Beautiful Girl
Can she make a dead man come back for more?
Zombies of the Stratosphere
Confederate Zombie Massacre!
Onechanbara: Zombie Bikini Squad
Hood of the Living Dead
Z: A Zombie Musical
ZMD: Zombies of Mass Destruction
The Naked and the Living Dead
Nudist Camp Zombie Massacre
Nympho Zombie Coeds
“We no make Olympic swim team, but we make plenty zombie kill dead.”
Oasis of the Zombies
Female Mercenaries on Zombie Island
Hamilton Carver – Zombie P.I.
I Eat Your Skin
Urban Scumbags vs. Countryside Zombies
Living Dead in Denmark
Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead
Platoon of the Dead
Gay of the Dead
Attack Girls Swim Team vs the Undead (AKA Inglorious Zombie Hunters)
Knight of the Living Dead
Teenage Zombie House Massacre
I Spit on Your Rave
Hard Rock Zombies
Atom the Amazing Zombie Killer
Hot Wax Zombies on Wheels
The Harvard Zombie Massacre
Erotic Nights of the Living Dead
Thomas Haden Church battles an implacable and furry foe.
Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak on a Plane
Graveyard Alive: A Zombie Nurse in Love
Fast Zombies with Guns
The Corporate Zombie Killers
Biker Zombies from Detroit
Devil Fetus
Deadheads
Gangs of the Dead
The Drunken Dead Guy
Mad Doctor of Blood Island
The Horror of Party Beach
Dead Clowns
Beverly Hills Bodysnatchers
Die and Let Live
Night of the Living Schlong
Bad enough they don’t shamble anymore. Now they’re carrying freaking GUNS?
Chopper Chicks in Zombie Town
Night of the Living Dorks
The Curse of the Screaming Dead
Gory, Gory Hallelujah
Dong of the Dead
The Bloodfest Club
Paris By Night of the Living Dead
Bloodsucking Nazi Zombies
The Book of Zombie
Gore-Met, Zombie Chef from Hell
Bong of the Dead
Bachelor Party in the Bungalow of the Damned
Attack of the Flesh Devouring Space Worms from Outer Space
BFF Zombie
The Aliens and Kong Kong Zombie
Zombie Beavers
You can count on my former bosses at Troma to make a contribution to the schlock zombie flick genre.
Vampires run amok in a women’s prison in the gorgeously illustrated, 80-page graphic novel Night Cage. When a newly made vampire is sentenced to an escape-proof, underground slammer, she quickly begins to spread the contagion.
If you enjoyed this article, check out C. Michael Forsyth’s collection of news satire, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.
The author of this article also wrote the acclaimed horror novel Hour of the Beast. In the opening chapter, the unthinkable happens. Then things get out of hand.
Hour of the Beast is available in hardcover and softcover at Amazon.com. But you can save $4 by clicking HERE! The Kindle version is just $7 and the Ebook is a measly $5. Be the first on your block to read this bone-chilling tale — before the motion picture hits the big screen.
OUT: The Landing Strip and other waxing styles are out of fashion.
IN: A more overgrown look is all the rage among the chic set.
By C. Michael Forsyth
LOS ANGELES – Ladies, don’t schedule that bikini wax yet. Lush lady gardens are the hot new look this summer!
Top celebrities including Angelina Jolie, Megan Fox and Reese Witherspoon are reportedly putting aside their razors, canceling private waxing sessions and sporting a natural bikini area.
“The fuller look is definitely in vogue among chic young women this season,” confirms fashion editor Christine Guldstens. “Trendsetters such as Hollywood stars, music industry icons and supermodels are choosing what’s called Jungle Jane style in overwhelming numbers.”
A whopping 80 percent of women ages 18 to 25 said they don’t plan to trim “down there” this summer, according to a poll conducted by a leading women’s magazine. That may sound like fuzzy math, but a waxing industry trade journal reports a precipitous drop in revenue since October. The downturn reverses 20 years of growth in “honey pot” tidying services and the rise of popular styles such as the Landing Strip, Brazilian, French, Hollywood and of course the Bald Eagle.
TIME-CONSUMING waxing, shaving and laser hair removal are not in vogue among Hollywood superstars.
The easy-to-maintain look goes hand in hand with the more modest swimsuits that are dominating 2012.
“You can’t carry off the Jungle Jane in a thong,” explains Guldstens, “unless you have a high tolerance for kids throwing sand at you and calling you Chewbacca.”
By and large, men appear to be taking the change in stride.
“I never really understood why my girlfriend spent all that time and money just to end up looking just like my cousin Cindy did playing doctor at age six whenever she dropped her underwear,” says sports photographer Ed Hilkey, 34. “Frankly that hairless look on grown women gives me the heebie jeebies.
“I’m so glad she’s switched to this Jungle Jane thing. Hopefully this means us guys won’t be expected to do ‘manscaping’ anymore either.”
DARING swimsuits like this one from Toxic Lingerie are less common on the beach this summer than in years past.
Copyright C. Michael Forsyth
If you enjoyed this mind-bending story by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.
.
The author of this article also wrote Hour of the Beast, considered by many the best werewolf novel since The Howling.
Hour of the Beast is available in hardcover and softcover at Amazon.com. But you can save $4 by clicking HERE! The Kindle version is just $7 and the Ebook is a measly $5. Be the first on your block to read this bone-chilling tale — before the motion picture hits the big screen.
PERFECT CASTING: Benjamin Walker is a better young Abe Lincoln than Henry Fonda.
By C. Michael Forsyth
As a former writer for Weekly World News, I appreciate the craft that goes into taking a ludicrous premise and making it come true. I was once assigned an article headlined “Karl Marx was one of the Marx Brothers.” A challenging task, since the father of communism died before any of the comedians were born.
Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter makes the absurd believable with the greatest success of any horror movie since Darkness Falls rebooted the Tooth Fairy as a monster.
The filmmakers pull off this tour de force thanks largely to brilliant casting. Benjamin Walker is a terrific Honest Abe and his earnest performance helps us forget that history is being turned on its head. Strapping and handsome, with just the right mix of naivety and gravitas, he’s as perfect for the role as Christopher Reeve was as Superman.
Second only to Jesus, Lincoln is the most difficult acting role. Even a great actor like Sam Waterson tends to appear corny when he dons that iconic stovepipe hat and starts spouting folksy aphorisms. Just ask the poor dude who played Lincoln in that Star Trek episode where aliens force history’s heroes and villains to duke it out (arguably the series’ worst). Walker is actually a more convincing young Abe Lincoln than Henry Fonda and in makeup as old Abe looks strikingly like photos of the martyred president.
Also well cast are Rufus Sewell as Adam, the icy and domineering king of the vampires, and Erin Wasson as his henchwoman. The blonde with the bee-stung lips is one of the most gorgeous female bloodsuckers ever to grace the silver screen.
VAMPIRE LORD (Rufus Sewell) is a formidable foe.
Another reason the film works is that regardless of the goofy concept, there is a truth at its core. When I read the book by Seth Grahame-Smith, I took it as more than just an clever interweaving of biographical information and fantasy. It’s an allegory. Slave masters were in a very real sense vampires: pseudo-aristocratic parasites living off humans they saw as cattle.
The movie manages to overcome a hurdle as high as the laughable premise: That we know the hero can’t die (at least not until he relaxes with an outing to the theater). I call this the James Bond Time Bomb Dilemma. When 007 is diffusing a nuclear weapon that’s ticking down from 90 seconds, we’re supposed to be on the edge of our seats. But in reality it’s bogus suspense since we all know he’s going to survive. Who really sweats?
Director Timur Bekmambetov slams the audience with vampire-battling scenes so dynamic that viewers forget Lincoln must prevail. One of the most memorable fights takes place in the midst of a stampede. Grahame-Smith, who also wrote the screenplay, lends a hand by throwing out most of the confrontations in the book and replacing them with more ingenious ones. So even if you’ve read the novel, you’re constantly startled.
Thankfully, the writer also alters the ending, which I found the most unsatisfying of any novel I’ve ever read.
RUNAWAY TRAIN: ABE and his boyhood pal Will (Anthony Mackie) see trouble down the line.
Of course, not every critic found this theater-going experience as delightful as I did. One reviewer admonished the movie-makers for indulging in “revisionist history.” And, sadly, he wasn’t deliberately trying to be funny. That’s like calling The Lion King an inaccurate nature documentary!
Some just couldn’t get past the silliness of the whole idea of juxtaposing a famous historical figure with popular movie monsters. Hey, to me that’s where the fun comes in. Others found the “reimagining” of the Civil War as a battle against pure evil too heavy-handed.
Hello? The Civil War was a battle against pure evil, as surely as World War II. What the heck do you think Hitler was trying to create? A society made up of a Master Race and slaves. The antebellum south was the Nazi state fully realized, and thank God Abraham Lincoln took an ax to it.
If you have any doubt about this, re-read the Gettysburg Address. You’ll see that the “stakes” were as high in the real Civil War as the one depicted in this vampire flick.
HONEST ABE took an ax to slavery.
Copyright C. Michael Forsyth
PRISON life becomes even more hellish when a vampire epidemic erupts in a women’s prison.
I’m excited to announce the launch of my first graphic novel, Night Cage! The premise of the horror story is simple: Vampires take over a women’s prison. Just imagine Orange is the New Black meets Salem’s Lot.
The project is being funded through Kickstarter. Folks who jump on the bandwagon will get a boatload of goodies and rewards, ranging from advance copies of the book and exclusive art, posters and T-shirts to a chance to be drawn into the graphic novel as a character!
Please check out the video out HERE, and share the news with all your social media friends!
PRISONERS fight for survival against a bloodthirsty army of the undead in the graphic novel Night Cage.
President Lincoln may have wiped out America's vampires, but werewolves still roam free. The author of this article wrote the horror novel Hour of the Beast, considered by many the best werewolf novel since The Howling.
To check out Hour of the Beast and hear Chapter One read FREE click HERE! The Ebook is a measly $5.
NEW HOPE FOR THE DEAD: Researchers may have solved riddle of Sarcophagic Lazarus Syndrome.
ATLANTA — Researchers report that they are tantalizingly close to developing a treatment for zombism that could halt the widening epidemic.
“We are cautiously optimistic,” said microbiologist Dr. Emily Urthway, an infectious disease specialist. “We’re keeping our fingers crossed that we’re finally on the right track.”
The breakthrough follows the recent discovery that a parasitic fungus that turns ants into zombies is it itself vulnerable to a white fungus that destroys it. Experts believe this newly found “hyperparastic” fungus can be honed into a weapon against the parasite that causes cannibalistic zombism in humans.
“We’ve known since the 1990s that the fungus ophiocordyceps which hijacks the brains of carpenter ants is genetically quite similar to the organism responsible for human zombism, known medically as Sarcophagic Lazarus Syndrome,” explains Dr. Urthway.
“We believe that by culturing in the lab mass quantities of the hyperparasite that feeds on ophiocordyceps we can deal a death blow to the zombie epidemic. Our preliminary results are very encouraging.”
MAY one of God’s tiniest creatures hold the clue to a cure? A fungus zombifies ants, feeds on their brains and grows right out of their heads.
The ant research, based on examinations of the remains of 432 zombie ants in the rain forests of Brazil, was conducted by an international team of scientists, including top experts from Penn State and the University of Copenhagen, and was published in the respected journal PLoS One.
When an ant is infected by spores from the fungus, the organism swiftly takes control of the insect’s brain. The ant is compelled to leave the safety of its nest, climb a tree, latch onto a leaf and stay there, serving as little more than a fungus factory. Eventually its head splits open and spores rain down on unsuspecting ants below, spreading the zombie plague.
SCENES like this one, from TV’s “The Walking Dead” may soon be a thing of the past.
“Zombism in humans progresses in a remarkably similar fashion,” according to Dr. Urthway. “The fungus makes a beeline for the cerebral cortex, our center for information processing, decision-making and consciousness, and literally commandeers it.
“The organism feeds on gray matter and within a matter of days rational thought becomes impossible. Brain damage also leads to the classic ‘shambling’ gait associated with the disease.”
Brain funtion may be so impaired that sufferers fall into a catatonic state resembling death and don’t awaken until the foreign organism has seized control. Most sinister of all, the crafty fungus compels hapless victims to bite fellow humans, thus spreading the contagion.
SUFFERERS of zombism may experience headaches as fungus seizes control of their brains.
The first known case of Sarcophagic Lazarus Syndrome in the United States occurred in the early 1950s, when a woman who had “died” after complaints of a splitting headache sat up in a hospital morgue and lurched toward befuddled staffers. A minor outbreak in 1964 outside Pittsburgh is said to have inspired budding filmmaker George Romero, creator of “Night of the Living Dead.” The director also says he was influenced by Richard Matheson’s creepy horror novel I am Legend.
REAL LIFE outbreak in early ’60s influenced “Night of the Living Dead” and this remake.
Over the years, many conspiracy theorists have suggested that the “zombie bug” was engineered in a lab, perhaps by Nazi scientists bent on creating death-resistant super-soldiers. Others insist the Soviets were the culprits, or that the U.S. itself developed the organism as a germ warfare weapon to spread chaos in enemy cities and that it escaped from a secret lab. But most experts believe the organism is simply a naturally occurring mutation of ophiocordyceps.
RACING AGAINST TIME: Scientists take every precaution while studying highly infectious fungus believed to be responsible for zombism.
Fungi are notoriously difficult to eradicate, especially from the brain, and past efforts to cure zombified humans or formulate a vaccine have failed. Infection rates have reached alarming new levels since 2013.
Following a rash of high-profile reports of zombie-like attacks across the nations, the Centers for Disease Control issued a statement recently assuring the public that there is no need to panic.
“Trust me, whenever we issue a statement that there’s no need to panic, it IS time to panic,” admitted a CDC source. “We’re getting perilously close to a ‘tipping point’ with this epidemic. The hyperparasite approach sounds promising. Let’s all hope there’s still time to beat this thing.”
Copyright C. Michael Forsyth
If you enjoyed this mind-bending story by C. Michael Forsyth, check out his collection of bizarre news, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.
.
Zombies aren’t the only menace facing mankind. The author of this article has written a critically acclaimed horror novel about werewolves. The Horror Fiction Review raves that Hour of the Beast is a “rip-snorting, action-packed sexy college romp.”
To check out Hour of the Beast and hear Chapter One read FREE click HERE! The Ebook is a measly $5.
NO MORE MR. NICE GUY. The Pope wants to wipe child-molesting scum off the face of the Earth.
By C. Michael Forsyth
Pope Benedict XVI has reportedly launched a secret holy war on pedophile priests and ordered his underlings to “go medieval” on them!
“Not only has the Catholic Church had to pay over $2 billion in damages to the victims, these vile false priests have demolished the image of the priesthood that it took decent men of God 2,000 years to build,” explained a Vatican insider. “His Holiness finally declared in a meeting with cardinals, ‘This madness stops today. It is time to go medieval on these fiends.’ ”
Tools of torture not employed by the Church since the Spanish Inquisition are now quietly being used to smash pedophile rings.
“We’re talking about thumbscrews, The Rack, The Wheel, The Pear of Anguish — even the infamous Judas Cradle,” revealed the insider. “When a priest is suspected of molesting children, he’s forced to admit what’s he’s done – and to cough up the names of his fellow abusers and those in the Church who’ve shielded them. Usually they try to resist, but within a matter of a few days, they’ve spilled their guts.”
BLAST FROM THE PAST: The Vatican has returned to the use of torture to root out evildoers.
Most shocking of all, the Pontiff has instructed his inner circle that men of the cloth who’ve broken their most sacred vows should no longer be allowed to confess their sins to a fellow priest and be forgiven.
“In the meeting in which His Holiness gave his marching orders to his cardinals, he said that child-molesting clerics are no longer to receive the rite of absolution,” recounts the Vatican insider. “One of the cardinals timidly raised his hand and asked him, ‘Could you clarify that, Your Holiness? Do you mean you want these pedophile priests to go to Hell?’
“The Pope said, ‘No, I’m saying I want these mutter-verdammt (mother#%@-ing) pedophile priests to go to Hell.’
“We all looked at each other, stunned. It was if he was channeling your famous American actor, Samuel M. Jackson.”
WHAT goes around, comes around. The Wheel was a popular form of torture in medieval times.
The sessions are conducted by members of the elite Pontifical Swiss Guard, who’ve served as the Pope’s personal bodyguards and agents since 1506. Although the Swiss are better known for cuckoo clocks than brutality, they’ve quickly adapted to the harsh interrogation techniques.
Suspects are kidnapped off the street, from their rectories and even from church sanctuaries as they don their robes for Mass. Then they’re whisked away to underground chambers in undisclosed locations. One priest who admits to “inappropriate contact” with altar boys gave the underground Italian newspaper Verità Nascosta a harrowing account of his treatment.
“Five goons in black garments tossed me in a dungeon that looked like something from a horror movie,” the alleged molester claimed. “When the priest in charge of the operation arrived, I was relieved and told him, ‘I am ready to confess to you, Father.’ His reply was, ‘If I want your confession, I’ll have it beaten out of you.’ Then he nodded to his henchmen and left.”
The accused pedophile was strapped to The Rack, lowered on the Judas Cradle — even waterboarded, according to the newspaper. After just three hours of torment, he tearfully gave a written confession and jotted down the names of three priest pals whom he claimed had also molested children. He was then escorted by a van to police headquarters and unceremoniously dumped on the steps, hogtied, with the confession pinned to his chest. The alleged pervert’s lawyer has asked a judge to throw out the forced confession, but admits that under Italian law that’s unlikely to happen.
The enhanced interrogation technique known as waterboarding has been around since the Spanish Inquisition.
Although kidnapping and torture are illegal in Italy, police appear to be looking the other way when the Pope’s squads engage in hardball tactics.
“The police hate child molesters more than any other type of criminal,” explained crime reporter Carlo Bennetiani, who penned the article. “They’re eager to get them off the streets by any means necessary.”
The first cases of abduction were reported in Rome in early February and 15 others have cropped up elsewhere in Europe over the past few months. No instances have yet been reported in the U.S., but experts say that the no-nonsense approach is even more likely to succeed when it spreads here.
“American authorities are acclimated to the use of torture when it’s for a good cause,” observed Washington-based legal expert Jodi Yeakerman.
OUCH! The Judas Cradle is one of the most painful and humiliating tortures ever invented.
The dramatic move represents a total about face for the Catholic Church, which for years shuffled pedophiles around from parish to parish or sent them away for “treatment” when the threat of exposure loomed. While in the wake of costly lawsuits, church officials have agreed to cooperate with prosecutors, they’ve never before waged such a vigorous campaign to root out evildoers.
Victims’ rights advocates couldn’t be more delighted.
“This is long overdue,” declared Holly Margretson, whose nephew was molested by a Boston cleric in the mid 1980s.
Child molesters are furious at the Pope’s new take-no-prisoners attitude.
“To literally tell us to go to Hell is turning the Holy Mother Church upside down,” complained Robbe-Guilliame van der Goosen, director of the International Association for the Advancement of Intergenerational Romance, headquartered in Belgium. “The Pope may be ‘infallible’ but this is outrageous.”
TOUGH GUY actor Samuel L. Jackson, seen here as Nick Fury, rarely minces words.
Copyright C. Michael Forsyth
The author of this article has written a critically acclaimed horror novel. The Horror Fiction Review raves that Hour of the Beast is a "rip-snorting, action-packed sexy college romp."
To check out Hour of the Beast and hear Chapter One read FREE click HERE! The Ebook is a measly $5.
BANSKÁ ŠTIAVNICA, Hungary — A female werewolf is being hailed as a hero after saving two boys trapped in a mine!
Edvard Ferenc and Nikola Szavo, both age 10, were “within hours” of suffocating when the shaggy she-beast led rescuers to the site, local law enforcement authorities confirm.
“People may call this creature a monster, but my family will always be grateful to the wolf woman who saved my beloved little Nikola’s life,” tearful mom Mrs. Maria Szabo told TV reporters. “Whoever she is, I just want to say, ‘Thank you, thank you, thank you!’”
The touching drama unfolded on Saturday, February 4, when the two fourth graders were exploring the abandoned silver mine at the foot of the Štiavnica Mountains. Ignoring a warning sign, they wandered down a tunnel and became trapped by a cave-in. Their parents reported the boys missing the next morning. But because the youngsters had claimed they were going fishing in a stream on the other side of town, searchers came nowhere near the old mine.
At about 11:20 p.m., Constable Iszak Hajdu, 46, was manning the front desk of the police station when what he describes as a “ferocious-looking beast walking upright on two legs” and covered head to toe in fur trotted in, foam drooling from its enormous fangs. Following procedure, he hurried to the gun cabinet and retrieved a rifle loaded with silver bullets. A law on the books since 1874 requires every Hungarian police station to maintain a firearm loaded with silver in case of just such an eventuality.
“As I raised the gun, I couldn’t help noticing that the beast had what appeared to be large, pendulous breasts,” he told reporters. “I hesitated to shoot a woman, even in animal form.
“She was whimpering and kept waving her paw as if she wanted me to follow her. I said, ‘What’s the matter, girl? Is someone in trouble?’ ”
Acting on gut instinct, the lawman warily followed the creature, flashlight in hand. It led him four miles through a winding wooded trail to the mountain. There, just feet from the mine entrance, he found a backpack belonging to one of the missing boys. Venturing inside, he saw signs of a recent collapse.
“I heard voices calling faintly from below, ‘Help!’ ” the constable recalled. “When I realized the werewolf had brought me here to save children trapped down in the mine, I was overcome with emotion. I turned to thank her, but she had scampered off into the woods.”
RELIEVED Hungarian rescue crew celebrates after pulling boys safely from mine.
A rescue operation was launched and just six and half hours later Nikola and Edvard were freed from a cavity 30 feet down.
“The boys were in a small air pocket barely five feet across,” revealed rescue coordinator Agoston Kulscar.“If we had found them a day later, they would definitely have suffocated.”
The identity of the werewolf remains unknown and attempts to follow its tracks were unsuccessful. A police investigation turned up several reports of sightings of a “mystery animal” in the vicinity.
Lycanthropy experts says such altruistic behavior on the part of a werewolf is rare, but not unheard of.
“The maternal instinct is one of the most powerful of all emotions and originates in the deepest and most primitive part of the brain,” explains Dr. Larry T. Welkerson, author of Werewolves, Shapeshifters and Theriomorphs. “For a woman to have concern for an endangered child, even when she is in wolf form, is not altogether surprising.”
FAMED TV pooch Lassie isn’t the only canine that helps people in trouble.
Speaking of werewolves, the author of this article has written a critically acclaimed horror novel. The Horror Fiction Review raves that Hour of the Beast is a “rip-snorting, action-packed sexy college romp.”
To check out Hour of the Beast and hear Chapter One read FREE click HERE!
If you enjoyed this article, check out C. Michael Forsyth’s collection of news satire, available on Kindle and in other eBook formats.
RULE No. 1: Never visit a remote cabin with no cell phone reception. Rule No. 2: Never go in the basement. Curt (Chris Hemsworth) and his pals commit horror no-nos.
By C. Michael Forsyth
Ever wonder why characters in horror movies choose the worst possible time and place to have sex? Why they descend into the pitch-black basement of a house that’s obviously haunted? Split up so they can be picked off one by one? All these questions and just about every other you’ve asked yourself while munching popcorn are answered in The Cabin in the Woods.
Produced and co-written by Joss Whedon, creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The Cabin in the Woods is a tour de force that works as a horror film, workplace comedy and genre-demolishing satire. It’s Westworld meets Wrong Turn meets Evil Dead, to mention just three of the innumerable movies to which it plays loving homage and/or gleefully skewers.
In the movie, five young college students fitting neatly into recognizable types vacation in an isolated cabin where horrific events begin to unfold. Unbeknownst to them, everything is being orchestrated by a cadre of puppet masters in a vast underground complex. The staff includes managers, technicians, accountants, maintenance workers and even geeky interns. (I don’t consider all this a spoiler since it’s revealed within the first three minutes — if you didn’t already figure it out from the trailer).
MONSTERS, INC. Horror is all in a day's work for company guys and gal Richard Jenkins, Amy Acker & Bradley Whitford.
The film derives much of its humor from the high jinks of these Dilbert-type drones. At one point, the bored-out-of-their-skulls staffers organize a betting pool on what horror the hapless vacationers will face first. En route to the cabin, the students ignore the cryptic warnings of a creepy old gas station attendant. When the guy later calls in to report, the staff puts him on speaker phone and giggle as he continues to drone on ominously.
WHO watches the watchers? Holden (Jesse Williams) happens upon a one-way mirror as Dana AKA The Virgin (Kristen Connolly) strips.
The concept is thought-provoking. What we generally think of as stereotypes – the Virgin, the Whore, the Jock, the Brain, the Comic Relief — are elevated to archetypes. It’s the best deconstruction of the horror genre since Scream, on a level that would impress Bruno Bettleheim, the celebrated analyst of fairytales.
RULE No. 3: Never allow yourself to be trapped in a siege situation.
Some critics describe the movie as an allegory for the process of filmmaking itself. How can you argue? The staffers even call their mysterious boss “The Director.” Beneath that layer of meaning, there’s also a wry commentary about our surveillance society. Marty, the wisecracking pothead paranoiac and “The Fool” of the group, points out that “Society isn’t falling apart, it’s coming together.” As he puts it, the “cracks are filling in” as technology devours privacy and living off the grid becomes increasingly impossible.
Tropes of the horror genre are simultaneously observed and lampooned. Sexy pre-med student Jules (Anna Hutchison) has just dyed her hair blonde when the story begins and it’s later revealed that a chemical secretly placed in the dye makes Jules, AKA “The Whore” act stupid.
While not likely to make you quiver in fear, the movie meets the basic requirements of a horror film: Suspense, characters you root for, formidable dangers and enough gore to satisfy fans of traditional horror flicks.
POTHEAD Marty (Fran Kranz) wields an unlikely weapon.
Brawny Chris Hemsworth (Thor in The Avengers) delivers a winning performance as Curt, the brave Jock. Fran Kranz earns plenty of chuckles as Marty, the Fool. He fills the position Shaggy did in Scooby Doo and looks the part as well. But the real stars here are Bradley Whitford and Richard Jenkins as the world-weary managers of the operation. Whitford, best known for his role as White House Deputy Chief of Staff Josh Lyman on TV’s The West Wing sends up his in-control, seen-it-all image with obvious relish. And Jenkins, looking like a worn-out NASA engineer, is even more droll and cynical than he was as the disembodied dad in HBO’s Six Feet Under.
The climax of the film is in keeping with its blend of humor and horror — way, way over the top, in a good way.
SPEAKING OF JOSS WHEDON…
HORROR and comedy were perfectly blended in Joss Whedon's TV series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer."
No one mixes comedy and horror better than Joss Whedon, as I’m learning right now as I watch TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the first time on Netflix. Somehow I managed to miss the series when it debuted in the late ’90s. I’m blown away by how good it is – one of the handful of TV series, along with Highlander, that is far superior to the film that inspired it.
The playfulness is pure joy. In the episode I saw last night, Xander believes Willow has turned into a vampire and thrusts a crucifix in her face. When she fails to recoil, he shakes it like a flashlight that might need its batteries jiggled.
WHEN Angel was good he was good and when he was bad, he was very, very bad.
But drama is equally well handled. The brilliant storytelling is displayed when Buffy loses her virginity to good-guy vampire Angel. Following convention, love might cure him of vampirism. Instead, in an inversion of Beauty and the Beast, he becomes evil, his soul ejected from his body. In the hands of a less talented writer, the next scene would be Angel bursting into Buffy’s room, fangs bared. Instead he simply acts like a jerk, humiliating her by showing her the night of passion meant nothing to him. Far more sadistic. And, since this is an experience many a young woman will recognize, it helps to ground the series in reality, keeping it a coming of age story as well as a butt-kicking action/adventure show. The more you watch Buffy, the worse Twilight looks by comparison.
The intensely dramatic and horrific is always leavened by wit. In the episode in which fellow vampire slayer Kendra dies tragically she first gives Buffy her “lucky stake” — which she has nicknamed “Mr. Pointy.” In the same episode Buffy’s watcher Giles sheepishly admits that he’s been using the crystal orb that can restore Angel’s soul as a paperweight.
BOYFRIEND PROBLEMS weren't the only things Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar) had to worry about.
I’m only midway through Season 3 and have already met so many wonderful characters, most memorably Spike, the cockney vampire with the Billy Idol hair and penchant for puppy love. By turns terrifying and laughable, James Marsters is absolutely magnetic in the role. (He won the poll of Sexiest Male Screen Vampire on this site by a landslide). Speaking recently to a publisher who uses Marsters for a lot of audio books, I was surprised to learn the star isn’t even English!
Spike (James Marsters) is the bloodsucking blond British punk you love to hate in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer."
I love how characters are allowed to evolve. A pitfall of many series is that characters remain exactly as originally written and are unaffected by the events that befall them. Most infamously Dana Scully in X Files, who is skeptical of werewolves even after battling vampires.
DROPPING his English reserve, Giles became a father figure to Buffy.
Buffy’s mentor Rupert Giles (Anthony Head) could have been a thankless role: a character like Bosley in Charlie’s Angels who does little more than provide exposition then step out of the way to let the girls swing into action. Instead, he develops a tender father-daughter relationship with Buffy that is the backbone of the series. He’s allowed to have romances. And the shy British librarian is not above opening a jar of good old English whup ass to save Buffy’s bum from time to time.
ANY role in which you get to wear an eye patch ain't all bad. Nicholas Brendon as Xander.
In fact there are no thankless roles in Whedon’s world. Xander, initially merely a goofball, becomes an increasingly heroic figure, always willing to charge into battle though lacking any special powers. This “geek” eventually gets to kiss almost every girl on the show. Wesley Wyndham-Pryce (Alexis Denisof), who briefly assumes the role of Buffy’s watcher and is even stuffier than Giles, is insufferable. And rich-bitch Cordelia is intractably airheaded. Yet even they get a chance to evolve into heroes themselves in the Buffy spinoff Angel.
ANNOYING Wesley and Cordelia developed into interesting characters in the spin-off series Angel.
Though the show premiered nearly 15 years ago, it doesn’t seem dated – you barely notice that the teens don’t text. Some aspects of high school are universal. You will always have good girls, snobs, class clowns and nerds. As in Cabin in the Woods, there are some archetypes that just don’t die. Or sometimes die violently.
Copyright C. Michael Forsyth
C. Michael Forsyth, the author of this article, has written a critically acclaimed horror novel Hour of the Beast. Plans for a major motion picture are now in the works!
To check out Hour of the Beast visit Amazon.com or save $4 by clicking HERE. The Kindle version is just $7 and the eBook is a mere $5.
C. Michael Forsyth is the author of "Sir Arthur Conan Doyle & Harry Houdini in The Adventure of the Spook House,""The Blood of Titans," "Hour of the Beast" and "The Identity Thief." He is a Yale graduate and former senior writer for The Weekly World News
.
.
Horror News 